I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize