theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
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