Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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