Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
