Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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