For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
