So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
