I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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