I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Randomize