you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Randomize
