i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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