Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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