yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
