Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
