its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
