Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize