Can Purell be used as lube?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
