hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize