just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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