physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
