Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
