Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
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