im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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