I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
