butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize