I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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