It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
