Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
