i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
