I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
