We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
