no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
