It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
you never un-have a 4some
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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