How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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