You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize