my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
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