i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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