ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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