so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
