pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Terrible idea I love it
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
