i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
i think my cat just said my name.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize