why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
