:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
