Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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