Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
