so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize