Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
there is glitter all over my balls
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