you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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