she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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