i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
